Eastland Disaster Meditation 1 - July 2023

Nearly 25 years ago, I learned - for the first time - that the Eastland Disaster was part of our “inheritance.” My mother’s family was holding this tragic secret for decades. It was never spoken of because it was mostly unknown. The older family members who did remember were unable to speak of it until 80+ years later. The tragedy killed 844, including my grandmother’s 19-year-old sister, Martha Pfeiffer.

It wasn’t just our family that didn’t know about the Eastland Disaster. The world, too, seemed to have forgotten! Back then, I was a young journalist and still believed in the power of writing to change the world. All I needed to do was research and write an article about my great-aunt and the Eastland Disaster, and then people would know.

It didn’t quite work out that way.

Something happened on the journey—the research project to uncover the truth turned out to pull me into the story and into the lives of my mostly unknown maternal grandmother’s family. I traveled anywhere I could to uncover what had happened and meet people who might have remembered. It seemed a lost cause since there was so little information. I met only one survivor, and she was a little girl at the time. I finally realized that the places I really wanted to travel to were not accessible by planes, trains, or automobiles.

I was pulled into the long-lost story of my relative, and yet it was vexing—disturbing. What kind of Pandora’s Box did I open? I just wanted to get the article done and move on with my life. After the article came another article and then a really long article that was a book in disguise. I never wanted to write a book, but it happened.

It would take a few years before I accepted that I would never be done with this story. How could I be? It was written into me, even before I knew of it. As my father would say, “It’s in the blood.”

In my book, I wrote this prescient line for my alter-ego/protagonist, Zara. But I think it really was for me.

“I halt for a moment, staring at my reflection in your tombstone. Your name, your date of birth, your date of death, and how you died superimposing my darkened, blurred image—branding me from this day forward.” Flower in the River.

Eastland Meditation #1 - 2023